Sunday, April 26, 2009

Hestia or CompTia?

Should I go on reading Classic Mythology or practice for the CompTia Network+ exam?
Or read blogs?
Dilemma

תעוף עיניך בו ואיננו

I live, I observe, and I think. Those thought nuggets have to be developed by further reading, otherwise I will lose them.

Here are some topics I should have read more about, but I wasted my time sleeping in and checking Facebook profiles. Maybe I’ll never get to it, or, as I hope, I’ll get to it at some point in the future. It’s either חבל על דאבדין or עוד חזון למועד.

Matzo

Biblical Significance: Aside from being the bread of Passover to commemorate the Exodus, matzo is also the only bread allowed on the Altar, and most sacred breads in the Temple were matzo. Also, Lot baked matzos for the angels, (Gen. 19:3) and so did Gideon (Jud. 6:19).

Etymology: Is matzo etymologically related to similar Hebrew roots for feud, glimpse, flower, drain, juice, or suck?

(ריב ומצה, מציץ מן החרכים, ויצץ ציץ, ונמצה דמו, מיץ ענבים, מציצה בפה. הי הי)

Leprosy

Color: Usually white. See Moses (Ex. 5), Miriam (Num. 12), and Gehazi (2 Kings 5). However, Leviticus 13 discusses red, green, and yellow besides white.

Causes: Gossip, per classic commentators on Deuteronomy 24: 8-9. Another cause: Trespassing of the priestly privilege, per Uzziah in 2 Chronicles 26. Are the two related? After all, the Torah makes it clear time and again priests have the exclusive license the handle leprosy cases.

Place: Moses: on one hand. Uzziah: on the forehead. Miriam: significant part of her body. In addition, Leviticus 13 discusses full body, the scalp, beard, clothing, and house.

Prevalence: It would have no relevant Halachic ramifications, but does the disease still exist today? If not, when did it cease to exist, and why? R’ Yochonan, a third century Talmudic sage, was familiar with the phenomenon in his days. See Brochos 5b.

5th of Iyar

Why was the State named Israel? If you were going to build a homeland for Jews, wouldn’t it be more appropriate to call it Judea? The ancient Kingdom of Israel fell a long time before its sister Judean Kingdom, and while Jews returned from Babylonia and reestablished Judea, Israelites were forever lost.

Why are the people of ancient Israel called Israelites, while the people of the modern state are called Israelis?

The Satmar camp refers to Independence Day with the Hebrew phrase יום המר והנמהר. The source is a verse in Habakkuk (1:6) that describes the Babylonians as ruthless and impetuous. I understand the Satmar zealots believe the State of Israel to be evil and its Independence Day a sad day, but frankly this phrase makes little sense. Call it a tragedy; call it a disaster; call it even Al Nakba, but ruthless and impetuous?

Whatever

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Heroines of Fantasy

I remember the story of Bais Yaakov martyrdom from childhood. I think it was Yom-Tov Ehrlich who composed a lyric euphemistically describing a flock of white doves ascending to heaven, but I’m not sure.
In 1943, ninety three Bais Yaakov teachers in Krakow Ghetto preferred to leave their bodies washed and pure rather than defiled and contaminated by the Vehrmacht—or so the story goes. A letter supposedly written by Chaya Feldman, the ring leader, relates the events to Meir Shenkolevski, director of Global Bais Yaakov in New York.
Apparently, Holocaust researchers have long doubted the veracity of the story. Some serious questions need to be answered before it can be accepted as believable. Rafi G. wrote a post yesterday at DovBear, where he quoted an article in Maariv that asks:
1) How did the suicide note found its way from a hermetically closed ghetto to a rabbi in NY?
2) How did they procure poison in quantities enough to put 93 adults to sleep in a ghetto where everything was rationed?
3) Why were Holocaust survivors from Krakow unfamiliar with the story?
4) Why was the letter written in a Hungarian Yiddish dialect when the author, Chaya Feldman, was most likely a Pole?
5) The Aryan doctrine prohibited the Nazis from such relations. Even if the policy was occasionally broken in isolated incidents, the same cannot be said about such a large group.
The questions are tough, but not breaking. Question #1 is challenging indeed, but the others not so much. They could have concocted a poison from household chemicals. Thousands perished everyday, so it’s not unlikely that a mere 93 passed unnoticed. I’m not a linguist, but I did read Yiddish from Polish and Hungarian sources. I’m unaware of any noticeable difference in the written word between both dialects. Anyway, I’d love to see a copy of the original letter. Finally, the story doesn’t claim the Germans actually had relations with the loathed Jewesses; rather the women themselves believed they were going to be raped. Maybe their captors told them that to frighten them in vain.
However, I don’t have any agenda to defend the story as anything more than a nice legend. As the Maariv article says, just as there are Holocaust deniers, so are there Holocaust fabricators. And the danger of both is equal. If one story turns out to be a myth, it casts a shadow on all the rest. As Simon HaAmsoni said (Kidushin 57a), just as we take reward for telling, we take reward for rescinding. God’s name is sanctified by the courageous act of pure women, and God’s name is sanctified by being honest and admitting a lie.
I wondered if it’s all a myth, why was the number 93 was picked? The following liturgical chant, (with an obscure interpretational twist), explains.
נחשב כצג באיתון דחות בפילולי עקלתון ונקדישך בשבת שבתון קדוש (מוסף יו"כ)
We deemed the 93 as courageous, reject with trials the dishonest, and we will sanctify you by the elimination of the pantheon of martyrs.

________________________

Roots for irregular translation

כצג: צג בגימטריא 93

איתון: איתן מושבך (במבדבר כד)

בפילולי: ונתן בפלילים (שמות כא)

בשבת: תשביתו שאור מבתיכם (שמות יב)

שבתון: יושב בשבת תחכמוני (שמואל ב כג)

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Je me souviens l'Tash

Pesach was great, thanks.

I spent the holiday, and a couple days before and after, in Tosh. We arrived onאור לארבעה עשר באורתא דתלת נגהי ארבע after a nice and pleasant drive.

We schlepped along the whole house, as if we were going to wander the desert for forty years. The Tosh liquor / mikvah store is unreliable and overpriced, so I crammed in a case of merlot and chardonnay under the back seat of my Honda Accord. Amazingly, I totally forgot about the wine at the border. Not that I mind paying the Canadians the few cents per liter; it’s just that I hate being pulled over and having to undergo the waiting, form-filling, and who-knows-what-else process.

Kiddush HaChama was very special, if not for the ceremony itself than for its rarity. It warmed my heart and frostbit my fingers. Ironically, the onset of the spring season was celebrated under a light snowfall. Well, the Vernal Equinox wasn’t really on April 8; it was two weeks before that. The sun played hide-and-seek. It thought it was cool to peek-a-boo out of clouds every ten-fifteen minutes to tantalize the celebrators. But it did expose its whole body upon the recital of the blessing, just as it was on the day it was born. Happy Birthday!

Right after the morning prayers, the crowd gathered in the court to the east of white synagogue. The Rebbe appeared shortly thereafter. A dais, decorated with banners, was built for the dignitaries, three long rows of tables covered in white disposable tablecloths were prepared for the congregants, and scaffolds for the young flanked both sides. The crowd was black, except for four people who were wrapped in a tallis. Those were R’ Yoel Zvi Moskowiz, the dayan, R’ Yoel Yechial Cohen, the Rov’s son-in-law, Hershey Fekete, and me. Women were banned, for modesty reasons, but a dozen women stood there, nevertheless. Some came in feminist protest, and others had nothing better to do on Passover Eve. The Rebbe no longer leads the services, so his son R’ Meilach substituted. After the service, the Hadaser Rebbe, R’ Avigdor Fisch, publically made a sium, (finished a Talmudic tractate), thereupon, tuna and egg sandwiches were served; L’Chaim!

The sun above Hershey Fekete's grandparents' home

Dais. The Dayan in a tallis to far left

Some of the crowd

Photo courtesy: Hershey Fekete

Mid-Passover the unbelievable happened. I fell in love with Tosh. The place I abhorred for better than decade as obnoxious and inhabitable suddenly appeared serene and delightful. Its residents walk around carefree and seem to live off nothing. Besides, I like those Canadian socialists. You get child benefit cheques, (Canadian English, all you spelling freaks), free health care, and you even get paid to learn French! I couldn’t think of one possible advantage Kiryas Joel possesses that Kiryas Tosh lacks. What about my job? Ha, nothing to lose here. Well, Tosh has no available apartments anyway, so not relevant; move on.

What else? Chol HaMoed I visited one cybercafé in Montreal and another in Laval / Vimont, (city names are screwed up in Quebec.) It got me thinking if I could open a similar place in KJ. Many folks don’t have Internet access here or even a computer. How about a cozy place to sip and browse? Nah, they will bust it down sooner than a page loads with DSL here in Monroe. Okay, so not a storefront-like leisure-oriented hangout that may lead to mixed dancing, but a discreet dark-alley basement with no available parking and furnished with five computers running JNet Internet service that sounds an alarm whenever a patron attempts to click a non-kosher site. I could make a buck here by selling overnight kugel every Thursday night. Maybe it’s not such a bad idea, after all.

What do you think?

Friday, April 3, 2009

והצדיקו את הרשע והרשיעו את הצדיק

Who is a hero?

Jumping into the river to save a drowning child makes you a hero? Apparently so. What about landing on the river to save 150 men, women, and children? Well, that’s contested.

Rabbi Avi Shafran thinks a heroic act is to display selflessness. It’s not enough to be exceptionally skilled, to be a role-model, or to save a city. Pilot Sully, the Moses in the Miracle on the Hudson, is not at all a hero. So what if he saved 150 passengers? He saved his own ass, stupid! Besides, he doesn’t credit God for saving the plane, and we all know who really saves airplanes in distress.

Bernie Madof, on the other hand, has a conscience. He didn’t flee to Brazil when he had plenty of a chance. He did not defend himself in court; he confessed, he apologized, and he turned the other cheek. What hero!

Okay, I get your point, Rabbi, and there is some truth to it too. But why do you have to write such an article now when Madof-scandal anti-Semitism is still looming?

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Plagues: Punishment or Enforcement?

בראשית טו

  יג וַיֹּאמֶר לְאַבְרָם, יָדֹעַ תֵּדַע כִּי-גֵר יִהְיֶה זַרְעֲךָ בְּאֶרֶץ לֹא לָהֶם, וַעֲבָדוּם, וְעִנּוּ אֹתָם--אַרְבַּע מֵאוֹת, שָׁנָה.  יד וְגַם אֶת-הַגּוֹי אֲשֶׁר יַעֲבֹדוּ, דָּן אָנֹכִי; וְאַחֲרֵי-כֵן יֵצְאוּ, בִּרְכֻשׁ גָּדוֹל.

שמות ג

יט וַאֲנִי יָדַעְתִּי--כִּי לֹא-יִתֵּן אֶתְכֶם מֶלֶךְ מִצְרַיִם, לַהֲלֹךְ:  וְלֹא, בְּיָד חֲזָקָה.  כ וְשָׁלַחְתִּי אֶת-יָדִי, וְהִכֵּיתִי אֶת-מִצְרַיִם, בְּכֹל נִפְלְאֹתַי, אֲשֶׁר אֶעֱשֶׂה בְּקִרְבּוֹ; וְאַחֲרֵי-כֵן, יְשַׁלַּח אֶתְכֶם.

 

It’s is evident from the prophecy in Genesis the plagues were an integral part of the broad scheme. Egypt deserved to be punished for enslaving the Israelites four centuries as God promised in the Abrahamic Covenant. According to what God told Abraham, the plagues were a punishment for crimes committed in the past.

But in Exodus, the plagues serve as a means of enforcement. Had Pharaoh released the Israelites immediately, Egypt would have been spared. From the mission prophecy at the Burning Bush and throughout Exodus, Pharaoh is kicked for being stubborn.

That’s puzzling.

Tony Tale

The Internet is flooded with scams, but don’t take it from me. Take it from a scammer himself.

So-called Tony runs a so-called business in so-called Los Angeles. Tony or his crony skims Craig’s List for job hunters like me to throw bait. He spots a resume and shoots off an offer. Not a get-rich-soon or a too-good-to-be-true offer; just a quite-good-to-hopefully-be-true offer. But it stinks from every angle. He tries to be as smart as he could, but he doesn’t get too far.

I think Tony operates a phony enterprise where remote workers assemble furniture pieces or something similar. He pays them with stolen checks. The workers deposit the checks they get in the mail. The checks clear the house because the paying account has available funds. It takes a couple weeks for the check to bounce as forged and not issued by the account holder. In the meantime, Tony, Crook, Cheat, or whatever is name is won free labor. But Not-Tony doesn’t want investigators to link back to him as the sender of fraudulent checks. So he wants ME to print and distribute those checks.

Or better yet. He doesn’t even have any workers. All addresses he was about the send me are his own. He will deposit the checks, withdraw cash, and get lost; a Frank Abagnale copy-cat. With today’s banking regulations, however, that would be almost impossible to do within the USA. Does he plan on taking the checks to an off-shore bank? Who knows? Who cares? I’m out of it.

But a little pest in my brain is still nagging me. Maybe I’m just pushing away a good opportunity? 2K is big buck paid for 40 hours work. Read the emails and Messenger exchange we had, and be the juror.

Blue text is me, red is him, and everything in green are my added notes. Not-Tony has a poor command of spelling and grammar. At some places I corrected his errors, and at other I left it as is. Ellipses (…) indicate that blah, blah, blah followed.


March 31, 2009 9:14 PM, Not Tony

Pacer Furniture Manufacturing, we are manufactures upholstered household furniture…

*8-10 hours a week on an ongoing basis…

Monthly Salary: $2,000

Please email your details to part_time247@yahoo.com….

Tony W Adams

Pacer Furniture Manufacturing

2035 E 37th St,

Los Angeles, CA 90058, United States.

March 31, 2009 10:12PM, Me

(I sent in my details; Contact info only)

April 1, 2009 2:32AM, Not-Tony

Dear Hershey

You will be working from your home by printing and mailing payments out to our clients and other departments in your region. (Light bulb goes on: Mail is not bound to a geographical region.)

Your position is to prepare weekly payroll checks from your computer and made cash deposits from your home. (Light bulb again: You said just clients; now you say payroll? And whence should take the cash to deposit?)

 Go to Office depot or Staples around you and get all the printing supplies.

VersaCheck software 2008

Versa ink or Toner ink for your printer

Business blank check paper (3per page)

The total cost of everything is not more than $100. You will get reimbursed. It will be add to your first salary.

Visit any UPS and FedEx offices around you, and request their shipping supplies (next day air envelops and waybills.) They are free. They will give you as much as you requested. (100 pieces or more)

As soon as you get them ready, email me back to start immediately.

April 1, 2009 10:47AM Me

I’ve them ready. (Brazen lie)

April 1, 2009 4:09PM, Not Tony

Okay. Sounds good

Let’s chat on Yahoo! Messenger…

April 1, 2009 4:30PM, Me

HersheyVent@yahoo.com (Yahoo! ID created impromptu)

 

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:21:04 PM): Hello Hershey

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:21:12 PM): Hello

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:21:59 PM): first step...do you have a scanner?

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:22:08 PM): Yes

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:22:17 PM): Ok...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:22:34 PM): do you have UPS envelopes and waybills for shipping?

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:22:39 PM): Yes

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:22:46 PM): And blank checks

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:22:54 PM): And VersaCheck

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:23:17 PM): Ok good...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:23:17 PM): have you been doing this before?

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:23:22 PM): No

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:23:36 PM): Ok....

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:23:45 PM): install the check software on your computer....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:23:54 PM): Okay

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:24:10 PM): Then...?

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:25:23 PM): You want me to send checks to your vendors and employees?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:25:33 PM): I will email our account information to fill on the software...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:25:34 PM): and print a sample check scan it and email it to me to view before you start the main printing

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:25:56 PM): Understood

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:26:25 PM): you will be mailing those checks to clients and other department....

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:26:41 PM): I will email you all there [sic] names and address

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:28:14 PM): Will you mail me a check?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:28:26 PM): you will be printing and mailing checks our [sic] everyday.....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:28:44 PM): I see, so I should print my own check

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:29:03 PM): And what about the cost involved?

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:29:10 PM): The shipping costs

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:29:29 PM): How much did you spent on those printing supplies?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:29:47 PM): No need

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:29:55 PM): we have an account with ups and fedex company [sic] to use

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:30:03 PM): Don't recall. Will have to check my credit card charges

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:31:13 PM): I will email you our account details to fill on ups waybills and drop them off....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:31:36 PM): Great

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:31:49 PM): check your email i [sic] had sent you the account details to fill on the check software....

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:33:03 PM): wait let me attach signature to it

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:33:19 PM): so that you can upload it on the software

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:33:29 PM): Okay

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:34:20 PM): How many hours do you think I'll have to spend a month on this?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:34:40 PM): 2hrs per day

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:34:40 PM): What is the volume of checks you will be giving me per month?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:34:48 PM): and 5times a week....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:35:15 PM): That's over 60.00 an hour

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:35:52 PM): is not a job that you will spend much time with

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:36:27 PM): When shall we start?

Not-Tony·..·´¯)--» My Only Love ... (4/1/2009 6:37:30 PM): I had sent you the details with signature to fill on the check software....

Here it is:

Swiss America Trading Corp.
15018 N Tatum Blvd
Phoenix, AZ 85032

 

Wells Fargo Bank
San Francisco, CA
ABA#121000248
Account#4159531235
Check#5774
Fractional#78-37-7832

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:37:42 PM): I want you to start right now....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:38:51 PM): I'm excited about this venture, but—naturally—I've some reservations, and I apologize for that. You will sure understand that there are a lot of scams out there on the Internet. Therefore, I would like to get my first check for reimbursement of the materials, cash it, and wait a week or more to see whether it was a valid check. You understand me?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:39:51 PM): Yes I know that there is alot [sic] of scam over the internet....

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:40:11 PM): This is not a scam...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:40:40 PM): we need someone for this position that`s why i contacted you in the first place if you are interested to work with us....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:40:41 PM): But I still want to verify.

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:40:53 PM): I'm interested.

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:41:09 PM): The money you spend [sic] for those printing supplies will surely be reimbursed...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:41:20 PM): it will be added to your first payment...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:41:22 PM): But I'm afraid that if those checks are fraudulent, I might find myself in trouble.

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:42:01 PM): The only thing I want is to wait two week from the time I deposit the first check.

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:42:15 PM): this is not a fraudulent check.....

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:43:49 PM): I'll be emailing you a sample check soon

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:44:00 PM): Ok I will be waiting

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:44:53 PM): You should have it by tomorrow

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:44:55 PM): Ok

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:45:26 PM): Who is Pat? (Name on signature image)

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:45:52 PM): One of our staff members...

(Light-bulb flashes: Since when do staff members sign checks?)

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:46:10 PM): Okay

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:46:42 PM): Will I be working on a 1099?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:46:58 PM): Am waiting for the sample check...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:47:35 PM): I can't do it right now. I'm already leaving the office. You will have it by tomorrow morning.

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:48:11 PM): 1099?

(Light-bulb flashing with dazzling red glare: 1099? Huh?)

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:48:27 PM): Ok… No problem...

(17 seconds for a wiki? That’s quick! But wait! You forgot to ask me for my SSN.)

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:49:08 PM): What is the working arrangement with your other employees?

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:51:15 PM): I will inform every one of them that they will be receiving there [sic] payments on Friday....

(He didn’t get my question)

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:51:16 PM): since you will start the check printing tomorrow...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:51:40 PM): Okay

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:52:03 PM): One more question

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:52:20 PM): The company name is Pacer Furniture?

Not-Tony·..·´¯)--» My Only Love ... (4/1/2009 6:52:49 PM): Yes...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:53:01 PM): Oh, okay

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:53:35 PM): Because the company name to print on the checks is Swiss America Trading Corp.

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:53:42 PM): So it confused me a bit

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:56:12 PM): Yes I understand you....we have different account names.....

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:56:22 PM): and we have some other company also...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:56:37 PM): just be filling them the way I email them to you...

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:56:40 PM): with no mistakes...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:57:39 PM): I sure will

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 6:57:56 PM): just keep following the instruction...

Hershey (4/1/2009 6:58:03 PM): I was just curious, because Swiss America is an established financial institution

Not-Tony (4/1/2009 7:03:33 PM): this is just for sample check only

(Excellent, Tony, Crook, or whatever your name is. You provided a good excuse, but I’m not impressed.)

11th Commandment

Moses delivered a new Torah, but this time he did enter Israel.

Thou shall not be a minister. A deputy minister thou shall be, and a minister thou shall not be. For these abominations did the Canaanites, the Amorites, and the Shas-ites, and because of these detestable practices thy LORD drove out those parties before you.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Velcome!

Moirei v’Raboisei!

Vaat an honor it is to write to all you losers who rambled into this prospectively miserable blog. Welcome! Please, take a seat, relax, and make yourself at home.

I’m a Hassidic guy from Kiryas Joel, NY with too much time next to his keyboard. I’m not a professional, although I want to be. I’m not a scholar, although I should’ve been. I’m not the sociable dude to hang around with; I sulk, really. I’m just a Pusheter Yid; A simple and down-to-earth Jew who doesn't knows much and doesn't care to know more. Okay, Lipa actually made the phrase popular and I’m piggybacking on him. So what? I thought it’s cool. Besides, I use an alternate spelling: Pusheter rather than Poshiter.

I constantly listen to my fellow Hassidim passionately discussing the hot button issues of the day, but I’m reluctant to weigh in. You see? I suffer from a chronic sore throat and can’t outshout them all. Besides, I just hate verbal arguments. I can’t bring my point across before I’m cut in by a raving contender or a mob of them.

So I decided to write a blog. Here I’m king.  Here I will make all my silly arguments, air my warped viewpoints, and tell trite and corny jokes, and I will do all that in a calm and peaceful tone. When I’m done, I hand over to trumpet to you in the comments section, and you’re welcome to blow one-hundred-and-one sounds—in a respectful manner, please.

Initially I had some misgivings about authoring a blog. The Internet (wrong term, but whatever) in general was banned by the Hassidic Rabbinate (I just made up the term, but you get the idea.) Internet is allowed for mercantile purposes only, and even that the rabbis permitted grudgingly. But then I thought so many frum people read Jewish news sites and socialize on Facebook. What harm could possibly result from the grumbles of a Pusheter Yid?

Indeed, because the Web is Satan’s favorite hangout place, I will need to expend extra effort to keep this place kosher. Save for separate comments sections for men and women, this place will be as kosher and as holy and as chumradig as the Web permits.

L’Chaim! To life!